Miss Aida
I kept screwing up.

I could see the annoyance on the anesthetist’s face as I bumped into things and progressively got more and more nervous, as I came near to jeopardizing the sterility of the operation room.

Keep your hands at the level of your chest.

Almost sounded like that line from the Phantom of the Opera. Only less dramatic, and in a setting which I was starting to freak out a little bit.

Thank god for the nice nurse who took me aside and helped me through the scrub.

A scrub, for those medically out of the loop, is thoroughly washing up the hands and forearms. Then again, that put aside, there’s a lot of other things one has to do; the placement of hands in the ‘sterile zone’, a hundred and one little things to think about.

At least that’s what it seemed like to me.

No pressure.

Oh wait. Except for a whole team of surgeons and doctors and nurses who would have to wait, re-sterilize everything, and a patient who’s surgery would be inevitably delayed.

I was told to move into the little space. I was in so close I was pressed up against the patient and the surgeon and I meekly stood there as an observer until I noticed the other surgeon looking at me.

The surgeon disconcerted me. He was youngish, with a serious face and I was so close I could see the flecks of brown reflected in his light eyes. It was his eyes though, the steady, unwavering gaze that unsettled me somewhat. An intense gaze, with what seemed to be a multitude of activity lurking in it’s depths.

Perhaps eyes are the windows to the soul. Crap, crap, crap. Please don’t ask me any questions.

He beckoned at me to pick up the scissors and assist him with the minimal procedures. I admit to a sudden prick of enthusiasm at actually being needed. Minor, in the least, but it was nice to be able to be ‘part of the team’, as we were so often told but more in name than anything else.

I suppose the new environment takes a little getting used to.
10 Responses
  1. yea, new environment sucks.
    booze helps tho.

  2. dania Says:

    Woo. I could imagine every second of those scene through your words. Time will make you that new environment into your comfort zone soon.

    I do however think, too much thinking while doing any procedure will only make you more nervous. ;) But that's just me being an observer.

    I'm sure you'll get the hang of it, and be a wonderful surgeon soon! Wouldn't that be cool, have a doctor who trade stories with patience while doing medical check ups.

  3. i can imagine the anxiety and all the inner demons (okay, maybe not demons) that danced through your mind. haha. we all know new environment needs warming up to, but in time, you'll rock it hard, i'm sure.

    all the best! :)

  4. Tash A Says:

    "The kneebone's connected to the... something. The something's connected to the... red thing. The red thing's connected to my wrist watch... Uh oh."

  5. SHaQ Says:

    isn't it great to be able to scrub in??!!!

    i love it!!

    but the worst part would be having to stand for hours if the procedure is long.

    my legs could break!

    have fun doing ur surgery rotation aida!

  6. Laily Says:

    and scrub could also mean the hideous green/blue/purple/brown get up you have to wear in the OT. or is it?

    what op was it? hope it wasnt a GI, the smell might be a little too intense for our puasa-ing nose. :D

    good luck, dear. n happy ramadhan :)

  7. aahhh .... an episode of grey's anatomy. heh.

  8. i really do appreciate how you're always one of the first to post a comment.

  9. It's so 'Grey's Anatomy'! Love ya hun! You'll soon get over the awkwardness *hugs*

  10. Zaty Says:

    omg.. i KNEW doctor-ing is not for me. T-T i cant stand the sight of blood.. my knees get wobbly and my head spins. serious tak boleh, huhu

    keep going, kak aida. you can do it!

    ganbatte kudasai ne~ =)

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