Keeping It In Perspective.

I shared a story a little while ago about a patient I met in clinic and his attitude towards pain. 

I think God had a reason for me to meet him because I got sick recently. I had a high fever, vomiting and diarrhoea. For the first time in a long time, I found myself unable to function normally, dragging myself out of bed that morning was a feat of its own. I kept myself hydrated, and remembering the old uncle’s attitude towards pain, I vowed that I wouldn’t let this sickness overcome me. 

I got better the next day, and even aching away as I was, I decided to go out and continue with my day as usual… Only to have someone run into the back of my car, and as both cars stopped at the side of the road and the perpetrator came out and apologized, “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention!” 

… Ah the test of your patience sometimes. 

I’m still optimistic. 

God tests us in a variety of ways and there are many others in the world who are undergoing bigger trials than I am at the moment. I’m thankful that I still have relative health, and that this temporary bug will soon pass and I’ll bounce back to normal. I’m thankful that I have my beautiful family and my dear friends and their overwhelming concern. 

No need to complain about my own first world problems.

A Resilience of Spirit

I met an 88 year old patient in clinic who had come in for knee pain, which would worsen when he was doing activity. He was skinny, with really deformed hands, the kind you see with really bad rheumatoid arthritis.  I've seen a lot of older people who suffer from really bad pain in their joints, and this sometimes leaves them unable to go about their daily tasts in life.

As part of my consultation, I enquired about his ability to do daily tasks, especially with the way his fingers were so crooked, but he smiled and waved me off.

It didn't seem to bother him, so I counselled him regarding his knee pain and the likelihood that he most likely had osteoarthritis. I offered him some pain medication, but told him that we had support for physiotherapy and occupational therapy if the pain didn't subside, and that we could always step up the pain medication if normal Paracetamol didn't work. 

He said he would take some for now, but told me that you couldn't 'manjakan' or give in to the pain, or it would gain control over you. He told me that his attitude towards pain was no to coddle it, but accept it and go on with every day life as it is. He didn't mind having a little bit of pain, but it would not be his master.

This man is 88 and still rides around on his motorcycle, does his usual activities of daily living normally and refuses to walk with a cane, just because he believes that the mind is stronger than the physical failings of his body. 

I find myself comparing him to the countless MC seeker that I see for a bit of cough and cold, or the patients who let their pains and aches get the better of them, and I admire the resilience of spirit this one old man has in order in facing his daily challenges.

God bless you old man. 

I'll remember you when I start feeling the aches.

Sheryl Sandberg: Lean In

A friend recently told me about problems she’d had with her boss, and how she was being cut from projects after he didn’t like the way she had responded during a meeting. Although she had attempted to meet him after and explain herself, he’d refused to see her or give her feedback. 

I found it shocking that he would display such behaviour and felt that it was very unprofessional. I didn’t know him at all, and couldn’t comment if his response was typical of his personality or if he was just being biased towards her, but it did get me thinking about the treatment of individuals at the office. 

I’d recently read Sheryl Sandberg’s book ‘Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead’, and found it a fantastic book that talked about attitudes and challenges of women in the workplace. Sheryl Sandberg is the chief operating officer of Facebook. Her book was well written, and very relatable, and I found myself fascinated by a lot of content she discussed with regards to women and their careers, things that often seemed straightforward but were sometimes a result of conditioning and social circumstance.

She’d spoken a lot about how women are sometimes their own barriers towards success, but what I found interesting were the studies she cited about the differences between sexes and perceived attitudes. Authority was seen as something admirable and natural to males, whereas the same scenario applied to a woman came across as bossy or demanding. The research also showed how women needed to change the way they respond in order to change those perceptions, and this I found something very interesting. 

It was good practical advice to bring to the workplace, because it was true – women do not have to become men in order to become successful, and we have to acknowledge and embrace those differences, and then learn to work around them. It is a double standard, but one that can be addressed.

Needless to say, I bought my friend a copy of the book. May it hold her in good stead.