Today and Tomorown

I had my first exam today. First exam for my third semester finals. I don't know how I went on that - I really can't tell. I just feel a general numbness about me. As if I don't even care. Questions all blurred into one long two-hour endurance event that I need to pass. And I don't even care. Something within me seems to be dead and buried. Emotion? How strange. I feel so drained.

I need your touch. Crave to be wrapped in your warmth, feeling your body heat against mine. To wrap my arms around you and just feel needed. Long to smell that scent of your hair, all fresh and clean and uniquely you. I need to feel your fingers intertwined with mine. The smooth feel of your cheek as I run my fingers affectionately across it. To bury my head in your neck while you protest. I miss that cheeky smile you flash me as the devil dances in your eyes. The way you look at the world so innocently I can't help but see the beauty in the world once more. How you instinctively know when I need you desperately. How long has it been since I heard you call my name? How I miss thee.

Life was once so simple. Once upon a time, it was black and white. Things were either wrong or right. Wrapped in the innocence of childhood, I bloomed into the greys of today. Where life is full of degrees of rights and wrongs and filled with so much more complexities. Things are no longer as simple as they once were.

Once upon a time, you were my friend and I was yours. Today, you are my best friend, my acquaintance, my college friend, my classmate, my workmate, my lover, my saviour. Tomorrow what will you be?

Once upon a time, if you stole something you were wrong. Today, if you stole something you might or might not be wrong depending on the situation that drove you towards stealing and your intentions that directed your act. What will it be tomorrow?

Once upon a time, you were my friend and I was convinced that I knew how to pick them, convinced that my friends were good people. Today, you are my friend who is just as caught up as I am in life's complexities, my friend who is mostly good but like every other human being, lapses into bad-ness once in awhile. Who will you be tomorrow?

Once upon a time, my sister was my sister. A sibling, no more or less. Today, she is one of my best friends, an amazing woman who has the potential to rise above the challenges thrown at her and the capacity to do amazing things in life. What will she be tomorrow?

Time flies... and weaves a web that blinds us from the simple rights and wrongs of the world. Things become more complex. The world is seen in shades of grey. Tolerance comes at a price, but what will the price be tomorrow?