I Would

I would preserve this moment if I could. 

 The tenderness in your smile as you turn to face me, in one of those rare moments where your control breaks and you allow the light to enter your eyes and smile as if the future belonged to us. How rare a moment it seems, that perfect balance between reality and playfulness. 

 I would breathe you in, the slight musk of your cologne, the fresh scent of soap and cool showers and let your scent stay with me through the day, so it feels as if you are there. The scent that lingers at the nape of your neck as I walk up and throw my arms around you.

I would melt into you, let the warmth of our bodies envelope us in a cocoon of bliss. Feel the contours of our bodies fit as we find comfort in each other’s arms. I would fall asleep listening to your heartbeat, beating so loudly I feel like your heart is about to burst out of your chest. 

 “You’re too good to me,” you said once. 

Don’t you understand? I know what loss feels like. My past taught me too much about the keenness of losing someone you cared for, and too many times it has felt like I was unwilling to step past my own reservations. 

Let me be good to you while we have our time together. 

 Let me fall unashamedly, unabashedly in love with you, day after day. Let me spoil you, just to feel a resonating joy in your enjoyment. Let me savour the happiness that you bring me, like the first warm winds of spring after cool winter suns, a taste of things to come. Let me throw caution to the wind and learn to open my heart in a way I never thought possible. 

Now kiss me, you fool.