Aida Zabidi
“You know this isn’t going to go anywhere,” he said, faces just inches from hers. 

An incongruous statement, considering how she was close enough to him to see every subtle nuance of his changing face. How the stubble made him seem just that little bit older. How his eyes dilated ever so slightly as he kept looking at her. How the lights seemed to soften the planes of his face, make it blur into something that was neither there nor here. 

He seemed almost unreal in the dim light, a creature of her imagination. 

Then again, if he really was a figment she doubted they would be having this conversation. 

“I know,” she murmured, never taking her eyes off his. 

“I don’t want you to get hurt.” 

“I think that’s my prerogative, isn’t it?” 

He almost laughed, realizing how typical that reply was of her. She always had this unwavering stead when it came to making decisions. She was almost as stubborn as he was. He used to get so angry when she put her foot down regarding matters sometimes, at least until he realized that all he had to do was to yield first. 

All it took was for him to apologize and smile sweetly, and she in turn would capitulate and meet him halfway. He smiled to himself at the thought before he realized that she was turning towards him. 

“You’re right, it’s your prerogative"

That answer seemed to tip her off balance a little bit, gave her the opportunity to open up and be honest with him. 

“I’m afraid. I’m not lying. I’m afraid of opening up again, and letting myself become vulnerable. I’m afraid that we’re going to fail. I have a thousand and one fears that I suppress. I can leave, and maybe I should, before all of me becomes too involved."

“Maybe. But fear is never something that you should let dictate your decisions. What does your heart say?”

She smiled, and breathed in the smell of him as she lay her head on his shoulder. The shadows flickered momentarily as she lay in his embrace, wondering how in eternity it always seemed the case that she was attracted to those whose futures seemed uncertain, seemed vague.

“That if we should fail, let us fail spectacularly – as long as we’ve tried.”
0 Responses

Post a Comment